How do I reveal my HIV status to my partner(s)?
Studies have found that most HIV positive people reveal their diagnosis to their partners and family within a few days of learning their status. Having someone to listen to your concerns and offer support is vital in this process. You might feel anxious in revealing your status but delaying it can strain your relationship.
Here are a few steps to keep in mind when revealing your status to your partner and family:
- Find a safe space: Plan on speaking in a quiet area where you can have a private conversation. If there’s a chance of a bad reaction, talk in a place where you have space but other people are nearby, such as a park.
- Be ready with facts and details: Oftentimes, people’s reactions to HIV are driven by fear and misconceptions. You should be prepared to explain the basics about HIV and offer resources where your partner can get more information.
- No expectations: Even though you are emotionally prepared to reveal your status, be sure to think about ways to cope with unanticipated reactions. You can consult a friend or a therapist before revealing your status to your partner.
- Be straightforward and specific: It is always better to tell your partner that you have HIV instead of saying that you have a chronic disease or virus. You could then go on to specify what you want from your partner in terms of emotional and mental support.
- Give your partner time: It is always better to give your partner some time after you reveal your status. This gives your partner some time to understand the situation and react accordingly. You can check back in with them or they can come to you when you are ready.
For more information, please visit WebMD .
What can I do to look after my HIV-positive partner?
You could do your part to support your HIV positive partner in the following ways :
- Listen: Hear your loved one out and offer your support. Reassure them that HIV is a manageable health condition. There are medicines that can treat HIV and help them stay healthy. Give them the confidence they need to get through this!
- Learn: It is important that you educate yourself about HIV; diagnosis, transmission and treatment. Having a solid understanding of HIV is a big step forward in supporting your loved one.
- Communicate: Being there for your HIV positive partner is very important for their well being. Be available to have open and honest conversations about HIV. It is okay if they are reluctant to discuss HIV but your support and encouragement will go a long way. Show them that you see them as the same person and that they are more than their diagnosis.
- Support medication adherence: It is important for people living with HIV to take their HIV medication every day, exactly as prescribed. Ask your loved one what you can do to support them in establishing a medication routine and sticking to it. Also ask what other needs they might have and how you can help them stay healthy. Learn more about treatment adherence.
- Get support: Take care of yourself and get support if you need it. Turn to others for any questions, concerns, or anxieties you may have, so that the person who is diagnosed can focus on taking care of their own health.
What measures can I take if I am HIV-positive and want to be sexually active?
If you have HIV, you can take these precautions to protect your partner:
- Disclose your HIV status: Revealing your status gives your partner a right to make their choice regarding the future of your relationship. It is important to disclose your HIV status; some states in the U.S. require individuals who are HIV-positive to inform their partners regarding their HIV status. Talk with your family, friends and your doctor if you are not sure on how to have this conversation. You can also check our article for more information: resources.lifia.me/relationships/#how-do-i-reveal-hiv-status-to-partner.
- Encourage your partner to be tested at least once a year: Even if you are careful and use protection, your partner should get tested for HIV at least once a year.
- Take your medications: One of the best things you can do is take antivirals as prescribed and get your viral load undetectable.
- Always wear a condom during sex: Even if the virus isn’t detectable in your blood, it can be present in your genital fluids. Having unprotected sex is one of the ways in which HIV is transmitted. Besides this, it is always healthy to have protected sex to prevent other sexually transmitted diseases.
- Consider PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) for your partner: PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) is a type of oral medication that can mitigate the risk of contracting HIV. It can lessen the risk of spreading the virus through sex by 99%. It also cuts the risk of getting it from sharing needles by 74%. Although PrEP cannot entirely mitigate the risk of contracting the virus, it is a good option to prevent your partner from contracting it. Contact your health care provider to get more information on this.
- Don’t share needles: Injection drug use accounts for 1 in 10 HIV infections, according to AIDS.gov. Sharing needles for any reason can expose your partner to HIV.
What measures should I take to get into a relationship with someone who does not have HIV?
For years, couples have maintained happy and healthy relationships across HIV status. Mixed-status couple and serodifferent relationships are terms used to describe when people navigate relationships where one partner is living with HIV while the other is not. There are several ways you and your partner can protect each other when having sex in a mixed status relationship. If you plan to get into a relationship with someone who doesn’t have HIV, read more about what you can do to protect each other at: https://resources.lifia.me/hiv-positive/#mixedstatus.
For more information on protecting yourself and your partners, visit CDC’s website and get customized information based on your own needs at https://hivrisk.cdc.gov/.
References
The content for this page was compiled from several public information sources. We would like to thank and give credit to the following sources:
How do I reveal my HIV status to my partner?
What can I do to look after my HIV positive partner?
What measures can I take if I am HIV positive and want to be sexually active?
What measures should I take to get into a relationship with someone who does not have HIV?
